Say it isn’t so.

I can only imagine that as time goes on feelings based around “sharing” our child will get easier. Right? It has to.

Today I requested well in advance “Easter” weekend arrangements to go out of town to a family reunion. Well. Low and behold we are going to pull out our agreement and start going by that. Well. In reality YES, we can do that, but traditionally we have always shared holidays.  I don’t think its a problem to have Lucy go to her dads over a holiday weekend. I have a problem with the fact that he wasn’t going to arrange it until it was cleared and convenient for him. Meaning–he knows he can get Friday night off. Technically his visitation for the holiday starts at 6pm Friday, technically he needs to figure it out then. Right?  This upsets me because he gets to dictate “when” he is going to parent and when he isn’t according to his schedule at work. YES, Lucy needs time with him and I would never try to stop that no matter how much it sucks for me. However, you don’t get to “pick” and “choose” what best fits you as a parent. If that were the case I would find it in my best interest to never ever have her while she is puking–more so when she is going to puke on me in the middle of the night–that is NEVER convenient.

My hope is that this gets easier. That my feelings don’t get hurt when he chooses to parent and when he doesn’t but that he someday will automatically want to parent no matter what.

She’s our child. So take responsibility. Please. She’s a human. Not a bartering chip or a choice. She’s a must. Or do you only want her when you want her. Please. Say it isn’t so.

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